Want to Lose Weight? 3 Things Your Ego Needs to Hear You Say

By on September 15, 2015

Now you may be wondering…

“What is she talking about? What could my ego have to do with losing weight?”

Well believe it or not, the ego has a lot to do with weight loss.

It has a lot to do with weight gain as well.

In fact, the human ego is responsible for a lot of the imbalances we experience in our lives, including our weight.

The reason is this…

Our ego is the part of us that sees things from a limited physical perspective.

Rather than understanding the beauty of simplicity and balance, it’s our ego that becomes completely enveloped in complications and feelings of low self-worth – especially when those feelings pertain to how we compare ourselves to others.

So if you would like to gain a better understanding of how to live a healthy life (which automatically results in a healthier weight), then read on.

The dots will connect by the end of the post.

I am going to include some wisdom by Dr. Wayne Dyer – a man who has not only impacted my life, but the lives of many others through his teachings.

He sadly passed away a couple of weeks ago – but his words, and his incredible Spirit will live on forever.

Want to Lose Weight? 3 Things Your Ego Needs to Hear You Say

#1 – I Am Not My Body

Whether most of us realize this or not, we are not our body.

We LIVE in a body for the time being, but we are far more than this.

One of the many problems that stems from confusing our real self with our physicality is that we base our value as a human being on our appearance.

The ego wants us to believe we are nothing more than this physical being that must look a certain way in order for us to feel a sense of self-worth.

We see images of others who are being advertised as the role models for the rest of us to look up to – and emulate.

While there is nothing wrong with carrying ourselves with a sense of pride as a result of treating our bodies with dignity and respect while caring about our health and well-being…confusing our physical appearance as our ultimate worth is a mistake that leads to self-hate, eating disorders, illness, unsafe exercise practices, jealousy and a lot of heartache.

When you know that the real you is the observer of all there is – and you use your body as a vehicle to enable you to exist in this world experience life, creativity and to bring light to the environment by allowing a sense of harmony to flow THROUGH you as a vessel…you will undoubtedly know that your importance here could never be minimized by whether or not your biceps or your backside belong in a swimsuit competition.

And speaking of competition…

#2 – I Am NOT the Opinion of Others

Here’s a question…

What would beauty look like if it weren’t defined by society?

Now ponder over what I am about to say before you answer.

Many years ago, a beautiful woman had a voluptuous shape.

You would see posters of Marylin Monroe, who had a fuller/ hourglass shape (and wasn’t photographed with six pack abs) – and this was considered the ideal body shape.

Fast forward a couple of decades and you would see women like Jaime Lee Curtis and Jane Fonda modeling exercise attire with little body fat – as they were quite slim. Another decade went by and Kate Moss (the slimmest of all of them) was the latest model to hit the scene.

The celebrities/icons and body types fluctuate as time goes on, but you get the picture.

So in response to all of this, did you notice how public opinion also changed with the marketing of such ideas of what it meant to be beautiful?

Would a voluptuous woman have been considered ideal during the time when a slim body that could wear spandex perfectly was being promoted?

The answer is NO. And the reason is because we believed the thought suggestions that were being made using visual stimuli with encouraging messages to go along with this to gain the approval of the public.

The truth is, none of these women ARE their bodies, and neither are you.

Their worth as a living, breathing soul wasn’t dependent on whether they wore a size 2 or 12 – but according to the good opinion of others – which was manufactured through marketing and thought suggestion (programming) – the idea of beauty changed and along with it…our sense of self-worth if we didn’t measure up to what was being peddled at the time.

When people look up to the figures being presented as ideal, they look to increase their own sense of self-worth by following their example.

Women mentally and emotionally tear themselves up because they don’t feel they can compete with their better looking sister/ friend/ co-worker, etc. It leads to eating disorders, extreme exercise programs and a host of other unhealthy behaviors.

And here’s the thing…

Men do this as well. 

They hold themselves up to the standards of professional athletes, actors and bodybuilders in an effort to feel better about themselves – basing their own value on their appearance.

And to expand on this – looks aren’t the only thing to create this behavior. Performance is a major factor in “inspiring” individuals to behave in a harmful way toward themselves and others.

If this weren’t the case, then steroids would be a non-issue.


The ego wants you to think you need to fit in and be like others – or better.

Whether or not you can wear the skinny jeans (which may be considered obsolete in a year or two) has NO impact on your character…but your ego wants you to think it has everything to do with your worth in the world.

Someone else out there will ALWAYS be:

  • prettier
  • smarter
  • thinner
  • fitter
  • richer
  • more successful
  • stronger
  • funnier
  • faster
  • wittier
  • luckier
  • more popular
  • have better legs
  • benches more
  • etc.

But they have no more worth than you do. They simply express themselves differently – and follow a different path than you do.

However, you CAN be YOUR best self by:

  • Taking care of your body through whatever fitness program is appropriate, suitable and enjoyable to YOU.
  • Eating nutrient rich foods prepared in a variety of creative and innovative ways to allow you to enjoy cuisine without guilt.
  • Simplifying your life in whatever way you can to help decrease the amount of stress within you. This could mean finding time to take a walk in nature, reading inspirational material, seeking out your creative nature, re-evaluating your priorities…and questioning everything you think you know about life.

Live your life in such a way that your beauty is defined by the light that shines through your eyes because you are filled with enthusiasm, humor and appreciation. When this is how you really feel (and if you don’t, this can change if it’s important enough to you), your appearance will reflect your self-worth from the inside out – independent of outside influences and opinions.

#3 – I AM Well

“As you think, so shall you be” ~ Dr. Wayne Dyer

We become what we think about – all of the time.

If you have thoughts about yourself that have anything to do with low self-image, these will reflect in your world as objective truth.

Even if you are overweight, obese or simply unhappy with your appearance – you can do something to change it.

While it is necessary to be honest with yourself about your current circumstances, it doesn’t mean this has to be a permanent fixture in your life.

However, the way you perceive your situation will determine your emotional response – which can either bring about inspired action stemming from a desire for overall well-being – or from a turbulent inner-environment of wanting to run away from your life…which almost always results in decisions that can cause temporary relief at best, and possible damage to your body, or your life at worst.

When it comes to weight loss, there are many ways to achieve this. You can still find inspiration and motivation without self-hate or the need to please others.

Nowhere in this post am I saying that you shouldn’t care about how you look.

Quite the contrary, I AM suggesting that you DO care about yourself enough to go about your health and fitness program the right way, and for the right reasons.

Don’t let anyone else pull your strings…

Don’t confuse your real self with your body…

And repeat the words…

I AM Well.

Your ego wants you to compete.

Your ego wants you to think you need to be better than others.

And your ego doesn’t want you to put it in its appropriate place, doing its real job…

…which is providing you with a temporary identification with form.

The ego can be your employee.

It can help you to identify how you perceive things and how you feel in response to life.

But when it becomes the boss, chaos follows.

You are more than that.

So to connect the dots –

Tell your ego that you appreciate the fact that it has shown you who you are NOT, because it has now given you some insight into finding out who you ARE.

And take care of your body by respecting it as your vehicle through life.

You will lose the weight – and you will do this for a lifetime.

“When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.”” ~ Dr. Wayne Dyer

So were you able to connect the dots? How does your ego interfere with your well-being?

Quote in the featured image was taken from “The Ego Illusion” post on drwaynedyer.com

About Dana Gore

Author of the book A Simple Guide to Exercise Safety (What You Don't Know CAN Hurt You), Dana Gore completed the curriculum at Fitness Institute International, Inc. as an outstanding graduate in 2009.


  1. Laura

    September 26, 2015 at 5:49 pm

    Fantastic article! I LOVE the paragraph where you explain the real you is the observer and your body is the vehicle for experience. Absolutely true! Thank you for continuing to help me see more clearly.

    • Dana Gore

      September 27, 2015 at 12:15 am

      Hey Laura,

      Thank-you so much for your kind words.

      Yeah…I had come to this realization a couple of years ago. It was an interesting inner-revelation – and makes you see how much value we place on our physical selves when in fact, we are observers USING a body.

      It just puts things in a different perspective when it comes to health and well-being. Takes the uneasiness out of the equation and places the focus on something more peaceful and joyful.

      I truly appreciate your comment.Thanks so much for stopping by 🙂

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